It is often I sit, butt in chair, uninspired and push the word across the page. I cannot wait for inspiration but must dig and tunnel for it from the depths of my person. So…. what happened over Christmas vacation? Not much. And a lot. It was our first Christmas in our apartment, away from the seeming warmth and comfort of having a Christmas in a house with a fireplace and a chimney. We did all the same things we usually do, we got the tree, we bought some new decorations and dug up some old ones (thanks mom). Things seemed to just flow. I remember years of arguing and manipulating the tree to get it just right in the stand, often pulling out our hair out and resorting to full swearing, then wiring the damn tree, and letting the cat outside for the season, with force. Turns out, it wasn’t that bad and I am sure God smiled on us, we five, in our 4 bedroom flat, living on a prayer and a shoe string. The tree went up without a hitch, in the stand and no swear words were involved. Jack, my sturdy 13 year old, helped with that. Then I got the lights up, the garland, easy peasy. The kids decorated the whole thing independently, I did not put up one single ornament. Caroline added lights around the windows and put up the stockings. It was truly beautiful and my seasonal affect started to creep upwards.

I am kind of dragged into these events, not being much of a planner, more of a fly by the seat of my pants-er. I am not sure why, but probably some of it involves fear. Fear of the stress I know I will put myself through if I try to micro manage this annual event which has almost become a soulless force of commercialism and greed. I asked for help from the Gods above and sat down to order my children their presents on Amazon (hmmm…commercialism and greed?.) But oh well. I had lists and big ticket items, few of them, so it was fairly simple. The financial damage was absorbed by Santa disguised as generous family members, channeling God, I do believe. Hah! Most likely, my kids would agree that it was a great Christmas. One of the perks of divorce is that they got a full on bonus Christmas with Dad, who also came through with the goods, the dinner and the fun.

So now the other bookend started in motion, a few short moments ago, the tree defrocking and pine needle extraction for which I was pulled off my chair to participate. In fact, I still can hear some odd noises coming from the vacuum in the other room, I might need to check out. As I listen and cross my fingers, too lazy to get up now after sweeping the stairs of the building to remove post tree pine needle damage, I reflect on the vacation and what we did, didn’t do and how to sum it all up so I can be purged of this writing project and free you dear readers to peruse other, more important parts of this website.

Time was spent with my mother, their grandmother, who does in every way possible, successfully enrich the lives of my children and myself in such a way that my head is left spinning when I remember her age. I do still believe she is more energetic than myself, though now she takes naps. We went to the New England Air Museum, which was an unexpectedly fun outing. We all did some extra sleeping, movie watching, eating and of course technology immersion. I’ll cop to that. None of the kids received technology as a gift for Christmas, not even by plan but by their own choosing. Lego’s, a gymnastics mat, painting and drawing tools and fancy purses were the call of the season this year. This holiday season has been one of the best I’ve ever had, maybe because I went in with low expectations, and tried to step out of my own way as much as possible. Nothing was perfect, but it was lovely, blessed and meaningful, for me at least. Not sure about the kids and the meaning yet.

Oh yeah, and Happy New Year!!!